Learn a little Punjabi yes, and grit your teeth for the tuneless wedding songs, but watch the film for its energy and for its lead pair who are charmingly unaffected.

Magic tricks are performed with a flourish borrowed both from Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale in The Prestige. Costumes are snatched from an Edwardian era and set in a house from a horror film. There are singing nuns; servants who stir, chop and slice with vigour; women who weep beatifically; and a model who appears to be in the middle of a Vogue cover shoot. Yet the only one crying in this marathon tug-at-the-heart is the producer, who has spent Rs 60 crore on red roses, red scarves and red ties.

I Hate Luv Storys relies entirely on Imran Khan’s genetic code and it almost succeeds. Please understand, it’s no small feat to make a romantic comedy. You have to marry a self-mocking tone with a sensibility that believes in pink hearts, cuddly toys and cute-as-a-button clothes.

Go watch it to see why even zero has a value. And why Ranbir Kapoor is the future of Mumbai films. An effortless actor, he’s just the perfect embodiment of the times we live in. Confident without being cocky, spirited without being arrogant, hard working if not always gifted, he is the Young Indian we all want to see.

…wake up, and go watch Sid and Aisha’s sweet little prem kahani. It’s not as perfect as the decor in Sid and Aisha’s home but it’s pretty. Ad yes, the boy gets the girl, a career and his parents too (with their credit card) in the perfect little summation of our consumerist-driven lives.

Socha Na Tha, which deals with the middle class shtick of arranged marriages and career confusion, is surprisingly hip. Its language, a mix of Hindi and English which does not sound like a Zee News bulletin, is contemporary and so are the characters, except the hard-drinking Christian father straight out of Bobby.

Despite a chorus which wells up every time there is a three-hankie moment, sun-kissed sarson da khet, colourful dupattas endlessly fluttering, a dementedly jovial Amitabh Bachchan and largely incomprehensible Punjabi dialogues, Khan strides across Aditya Chopra’s screenplay with assured ease.
Anil Mehta’s camera loves him and so does most of India.