Joy is a decent biographical drama anchored by J-Law’s performance, but fails to realise its greater ambitions.

And J-Law is fine on her own, thank you very much. Don’t be surprised if she wipes the floor with all competition to win her second Oscar.

And I don’t know about you, but when I go to an alien-invasion movie I want to see some aliens actually invading. This is evidently not a priority for director J Blakeson, however, who sticks to formulaically adapting the book to make a slightly colourless film.

It’s all mostly harmless as far as these things go – lazy, sure, but harmless.

And if you ever wanted to see a chipmunk sing Baby Got Back and Uptown Funk, well, congratulations, Christmas is here.

After the thrilling convolutions – narrative and moral – of Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown, Reservoir Dogs, Kill Bill and even Inglorious Basterds, Tarantino has stopped challenging himself.

Django Unchained is where he became his own yes man, and by the looks of The Hateful Eight, he hasn’t yet remedied the issue.

Though my mind could change with another viewing. That’s the power of Tarantino.

For a movie about vulnerable men trapped half-a-mile underground, The 33 fails to convey a sense of claustrophobia or dread that would ensure viewers are present every second

But it still has a heart. It is, after all, an extraordinary story of courage, hope, and faith.

…what’s sad is that the film won’t challenge the audience one bit. And just might send those insensitive to gender issues straight to sleep.

The tough guy-nice guy dichotomy is a set-up for some stereotypical masculine showdowns: building stuff, handling bullies, and comparing physical attributes. And a dance-off.

I’m not sure if there’s even a point in talking about cinematography. Oh, there was a GoPro skateboarding scene that’s the film’s one clever visual touch. That’s it.

Viewers looking for an educational adaptation of Bolivian political history will, without question, find a lot of problems.

Those hoping for a zany dramedy may find that Green spends too much time trying to emphasise larger sociocultural messages instead of only delivering cutting satire.

The fact that the movie runs out of plot long before it runs out of stunts to show off, makes Point Break a remake that really ought not to have been made.

But if adrenaline is your heroin, do yourself a favour and go to a theatre. This would be really pointless to see on a small screen.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is the movie it was promised to be, with great new characters, a respect for the original trilogy and a strong understanding of what makes this franchise click with fans.

But in the end it matters not, this review. See the film, you probably will. See the film, you should.