Bland, unimaginative, and entirely pointless, this is one film that needn’t have been made. Stay home and take a nap instead.

Super-rich men who have had accidents in super-secret labs and now live in super-size castles in super-solitude are rarely up to any good.

Alas, the film – just like its favoured food – is pure junk.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles does have some rather enjoyable action sequences and cheesy, yet funny one-liners though.