It’s a lame rom-com, a lame melodrama, a lame slapstick and a lame attempt at schmaltz — all rolled into one horribly lame package.

When there are so many factors going against a movie, you expect the story to compensate things. Sadly it’s paper thin, and crumbles under the weight of the film’s mediocrity. You might argue that it’s unfair to compare City Lights to Metro Manila, and that this film was made only for those who aren’t familiar with the original film, but those people do deserve better, more polished material.

The film is definitely better than the misbegotten Snow White and the Huntsman and the other recent fairytales trying to have an adult spin, but it surely isn’t a classic. It’s a missed opportunity.

Days of Future Past is great. I think it’s the best X Men movie I’ve seen. It brings back the nostalgia of X1 and the magic of X2, and makes you forget about every other movie made in the canon.

A disaster of a film with terrible animation…

The best thing that could be said about Heropanti is that it is not as terrible as Salman Khan and Akshay Kumar films. The second best thing about it is that Tiger Shroff may be effeminate, but he’s a likable guy who can do some truly amazing stunts.

The battle scenes are terrific. The scale is massive, the CGI is super detailed and the Kaiju artwork is really fucking cool. The 3D isn’t the best, but the super wide shots are superbly choreographed to show how puny humans are, and you’ll get the best experience in 2D.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is much better than the first movie.

But then we need to get into semantics, because the first movie was absolutely awful and unwatchable. This one is bigger, more colorful and more action packed, but those three things are never enough to make a film amazing.

It has hints of pulp, a dash of slapstick, a helping of noir, some serious drama, shootouts. But the pulp is not pulpy enough, the comedy is not funny, the action is lame, and our heroine Rani, played by the wonderful Kangana Ranaut has nothing to do except overcompensate for the film’s half-baked nature.

Dharma’s trademark visual style and a few moments of comedy aside, 2 States is mostly a chore and periodically infuriating. The filmmakers had a chance to go against all odds and make a classic and they blew it. Critical appreciation might not be the film’s target anyway, because it’s been marketed well enough to make a truckload of money.