The only people who prevent you from strangling yourself is the forever-bickering couple played by Anil Kapoor and Madhuri Dixit.

Faces common to every single Dhamaal/Golmaal movie make an appearance in the Ajay Devgn starrer but the only stars are Madhuri Dixit and Anil Kapoor, and it is tragic to see them languish thus.

The Best Part About This Film Is That It Is Not A Sex Comedy…In this diluted adult spin on children’s humour, everyone is a Cartoon Network character, making faces at the camera as if it were a two-year-old infant

Given that a raucous mindless comedy has not been around for a bit, I won’t be surprised if ‘Total Dhamaal’ rakes in the moolah this weekend and is back with yet another edition, soon.

Total Dhamaal would be unwatchable without Madhuri’s spunk and bossy swag playing off Anil Kapoor’s bellyaching, bugged half’s protests.

This jodi deserves a better film. And you need no brains to know that.

In a film like Total Dhamaal, the actors are reduced to such chumps that the animals that they run into in the climax – elephants, chimps, tigers, lions, gorillas and other poor creatures who deserve much better – seem to look as askance at them as the paying audience. If nothing else, Total Dhamaal is a great leveller – it reduces all of us, critics included, to dunces, some willing and some not-so-willing. But that would be only if you go anywhere near it. The choice is yours.

Nothing about “Total Dhamaal” will stay with you after you have left the theatre, but while you are in there, you can be assured of a few laughs.

Given the ensemble cast, this film had the potential to be a comic roller coaster ride. However, the fact that the film is slapstick is not a problem, what brings it down is poor writing and execution.

If you’re in the mood to laugh-out-loud, give this one a try. But be warned, laughter comes with a price!

…the film fails with its comedy and punch-lines and leaves you with a headache…

Overall, ‘Total Dhamaal’ is a fair entertainer, but not the full-on feast it promised to be.

…the film attempts to deliver a mixed message about how animals living in captivity need to be saved from avaricious developers. In the process, as they set aside their selfishness, this collective of crazies finds their conscience and we find a quick exit from the cinema.

Total Dhamaal is a total time-pass film sans any intelligence. You could term it as an acceptable good grade from a below average student

Total Dhamaal is a one-time watch but only when it airs on TV on a Sunday afternoon when you can’t seem to find the remote to turn it off.

There is one genuinely giggly moment in Total Dhamaal. It involves some cars, a train, a railway tunnel and lots of silliness. But such unfettered frivolity is barely there in the over two hour long slog of a film.

Some of the humour is nicely timed and executed, and Indra Kumar even tucks in a message of environmental conservation (delivered through tamed wild animals). There are enough lines here to fuel WhatsApp conversations – until the next such movie comes along.